See the other pages in the reporting section Index Essential notes Calling card Checklist Questionnaire   The questionnaire Please print out this questionnaire and take it to the church service with you. Alternatively, if you've read the questionnaire thoroughly, take our handy and less bulky checklist with you instead. You can use your print-out to make notes either during or after the service. Warning: your answers to questions 6, 7 and 11 will need to be noted down while the service is actually happening.     Section 1: Your contact details     Your name (this will not appear on your published report)       Your email address (nor will this appear)       Please confirm your email address       Section 2: Introduction     Your alias name       The name and location of the church (e.g. St Emo's, Buffalo, New York)       The church's denomination       The church's website address (if any)       Describe the building in a few sentences       Anything special about the church as a community?       Anything interesting or unusual about the immediate neighbourhood?       Please supply the names of those who led the service (minister, preacher, celebrant, etc.)       On what date did the service take place – and at what time?       Section 3: The 20 questions     The questions in bold type are the ones which will be published. The rest of the text won't appear, but are notes to help you write the sort of thing we're looking for.               1. What was the name of the service? Examples: Morning Prayer, Family Worship, High Mass...       2. How full was the building? Bulging at the seams, mostly full, half full, practically empty... or what?       3. Did anyone welcome you personally? If so, how did they do it? A handshake as they handed you a hymnbook, the person next to you saying hello as you sat down, a question about where you're from during 'the peace'... or what?       4. Was your pew comfortable? If it wasn't a pew, tell us. Some churches have no seating at all (for example, the Orthodox), so tell us how you felt standing for 2 hours...       5. How would you describe the pre-service atmosphere? Was it quiet and reverential, full of crying babies and people exchanging gossip, or completely deserted because everyone was late?       6. What were the exact opening words of the service? Please note the very first sentence spoken – scribble it down on a service sheet or something       7. What books did the congregation use during the service? Examples: Bible, prayer book, hymn book, songbook – if possible, note down the Bible version and any other book titles       8. What musical instruments were played? Examples: Organ, piano, keyboards, guitar, flute, clarinet, saxophone, drums, tambourine       9. Did anything distract you? If you're tempted to write "nothing" here, please think again! We want your report to be as colourful and atmospheric as possible. Examples: mobile phone going off, smell of fresh paint, bellowing baby, attractive member of the opposite sex in the next pew, ghastly stained glass, freezing temperatures...                 10. Was the worship stiff-upper-lip, happy clappy, or what? We're looking for a description of style here, and you might like to include a concrete example to illustrate the style.                 11. Exactly how long was the sermon? To the nearest minute, please. If there wasn't a sermon, please enter "no sermon" in the box and ignore questions 12 and 13.                 12. On a scale of 1-10, how good was the preacher? Where 1 = diabolical and 10 = John Wesley. If there was no sermon, please ignore this.   Please select ---------- 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10               If you have any comments on the preacher's style, technique or eccentricites, please note them here                 13. In a nutshell, what was the sermon about? Please summarize the sermon in a few short sentences. Were topical, cultural or political issues mentioned? If there was no sermon, please ignore this section.                 14. Which part of the service was like being in heaven? Examples: wonderful singing, things that were said and done which were moving or thought-provoking, moments of luminous spirituality...                 15. And which part was like being in... er... the other place? Warning: if you write "nothing" here, it's unlikely that your report will be accepted for publication. Examples: microphone failures, over-long prayers, being coerced to hug the person next to you, other moments of embarrassment...                 16. What happened when you hung around after the service looking lost? If no one is talking to you, please stand in an obvious place at the back of the church for about five minutes, embarrassing though it may be, and tell us how you felt. On the other hand, if people do talk to you after the service, please tell us about it.                 17. How would you describe the after-service coffee? Or tea, or fruit juice, or sherry. Was it fairly traded? Was it in a plastic cup... was it hot or cold... were there cakes and cookies?                 18. How would you feel about making this church your regular (where 10 = ecstatic, 1 = terminal)?   Please select ---------- 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10               If you have any comments on making this your regular church, please note them here:                 19. Did the service make you feel glad to be a Christian?                 20. What one thing will you remember about it in seven days' time?       Section 4: Pictures of the church     Please confirm that you are emailing us at least one picture of the church. If you did not take a photo of the church yourself, please point us to a large photo of the church online. If you are not sure what size we need, look at any of our published reports.         I am sending my photo of the church by email I have found a large photo of the church online at the following web address (please enter the address below):           Section 5: Anything else?     If you have any special comments you want to give to the editor, note them down here.       Section 6: Declaration     We have very occasionally had problems with reports that are submitted in bad faith. To preserve the integrity of the Mystery Worshipper project, we therefore ask you to complete the following declaration by clicking the "yes" button below. I do not personally know any of the people who took a leadership role in this service, and I have not commented on any other people in the church who are known to me personally. I have not been asked to report on this church by anyone who is connected with it.       Yes No         If you have clicked the "no" button but would still like your report to be considered for publication, please give your reasons here.       Section 7: Filing your report     This is the end of the Mystery Worshipper Questionnaire. If you have completed it all – congratulations! Before you do anything else, please make sure that you have a copy of everything you are sending us in a separate file – otherwise all your work could be lost if there is a transmission fault. If in doubt, see the "filing your report" section of the notes. Please send your report to us by hitting the "Send!" button below. Thank you for contributing to Ship of Fools.