7. Unfortunate Worship Lyric Award
Winner: 'Jesus take me as I am...'
If writing hymns and worship songs is the attempt to bring heaven down to earth, this award is for those songs that crashed and burned. The author of our winner is Dave Bryant, who seems to have had a gift for writing 'stream of consciousness' material in the late 70s and early 80s. His much-sniggered-over classic song from 1978 (Thankyou Music), pulled 38% of the vote.
Jesus take me as I am,
I can come no other way,
Take me deeper into you,
Let my flesh life melt away.
Surely someone... a friend perhaps... an alert editor... could have taken brother Dave on one side and given him a quick update on modern innuendo?
Runners-up
Our three runners-up, in descending order, are...
- French kissing – by Ian Smale (Thankyou Music 1982):
'Lord you put a tongue in my mouth
and I want to sing to you...'
We ask: how can Ian Smale not have noticed what he was writing? After all, every teenager who's sung it since has. Received 34% of the vote.
- Pierced ears – by Steven Croft (Dayspring Music USA/Word UK 1980):
'Pierce my ear, O Lord my God,
Take me to your throne this day.'
A favourite song for tattooists and piercing artists everywhere. Received 17% of the vote.
- Going out with Joy – by Stuart Dauermann (Lillenas Publishing company 1975). The song opens with the line:
'You shall go out with joy...'
A prophetic word to bring hope to amorous young men the world over. The second line must surely be: 'And you'll get off with Jan...' Received 11% of the vote.
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