DIVINE DOZEN CHOSEN FOR VIRTUAL VOYAGE OF A LIFETIME

The Divine Dozen have booked their passage on the voyage of a lifetime – as contestants onboard the Ark.

"More than 1,000 people enquired about the game, so our finalists are a determined bunch," explains game administrator Clare Rishbeth. "We auditioned the best 30 holy heavyweights in an online chatroom. Daniel rubbed vitual shoulders with Mary who fluttered her eyelashes at Simon Peter who discussed mothers-in-law with Moses who tried to edge away from Jezebel who was dismissing Esther's beauty regime. The real game looks like being even more entertaining – and intriguing."

The final 12 contestants, who live in the UK, US and Canada, will be playing the following Bible characters onboard the Ark...

Esther
Eve
Job
John the Baptist
Joseph
Martha
Mary Magdalene
Moses
Nebuchadnezzar
Paul
Samson
Simon Peter

The divine dozen dazzled The Ark's judges by battling their way through every situation thrown at them – an unholy combination of Miss World contests and cookery programmes. And it will be much the same on board The Ark – except this time the contestants will be on board a 3D boat as cartoon characters, moving from room to room and communicating through speech bubbles.

Click here to see screenshots from inside the Ark.

"We asked each contestant to write up an imaginary diary entry for their character's birthday," said Clare Rishbeth. "The entries indicate we've discovered an unruly, amorous, accident prone and, quite honestly, unhinged bunch of characters – the kind you would dread being stuck in a lift with."

Nebuchadnezzar: "The Hittite ambassador had the temerity to suggest that we might want to give up a bit of our border to his sovereign. On my birthday, too! We will send him back to his beloved emperor, entrail by entrail."

Jonah: "I know I'm a total failure. Mary Magdalene tries to cheer me up. 'No, Jonah,' she says. 'You're a GREAT prophet of doom. Every time you say "Repent" in that magnificent voice of yours, it gives me chills.' But then she tells me the next five minutes are gonna cost $20."

Martha: "Oh well, I'll occupy myself mending holes in Lazarus's graveclothes – very poorly made. Suppose they don't expect you to use them more than once."

Joseph: "Woke up. Sang happy birthday to me, gorgeously, backed by a choir of 100 children singing 'la'"

"The real people behind each Bible character will not be revealed until they are made to walk the plank – or win the contest," explained Clare Rishbeth. "Esther, Job and the rest are now living in blacked-out rooms sealed with duct tape and plastic sheeting in order to prepare mentally, physically and spiritually for the voyage ahead!"